Stocks in Tanning Salons fell on the news.
The five dancers - Lacey Schwimmer, Jonathan Roberts, Karina Smirnoff, Dmitry Chaplin and Anna Demidova - were taken from their homes and secured in a cabin somewhere in the woods in California. In order to cover the crime the dancers' Twitter accounts were taken over by a computer program.
Fans first became suspicious when the quality of the tweets increased.
The program tweets phrases commonly used by the dancers. Examples include "Awh, isn't my dog cute", "I'm cleaning the bathroom", "I look hot in a bikini", "My wife looks hot in a bikini" and "Help! I've been abducted and I'm in a cabin in the woods".
The fans' first reaction was to start on-line petitions and retweet them to themselves. When that didn't work a number threatened to boycott the show. The producers struck back by leaking rumors that Pamela Anderson and Kate Gosselin were due to appear which started heated discussions all over again, taking the spotlight off the abductions.
A source with knowledge of the situation said that the cabin is very comfortable with beautiful parquet floors, a mini-mirrorball and mirrored walls. A team of hairdressers and make-up artists are in constant attendance to calm the five when they get too overwrought. Bad behavior is met with threats of having to appear on the results show.
The producers are confident that when the celebrities are announced the fans will concentrate on that, and there will be enough shiny things on the show's premier to distract everyone from the plight of the 5.
Cafepress and Zazzle have been deluged with designs for t-shirts, and sales are through the roof. Although no one has been spotted wearing one yet.
Will this tear the show apart? Or will the viewing millions simply watch what is put in front of them? Time will tell!
NEXT WEEK'S STORY: Samantha Harris was really a robot??
